Dating a guy who lives with the parents? You’re not alone. Research has found nearly 30 percent of 25- to 34-year-olds are living at home. Of course, dating a man who lives with the ‘rents is different than being with a dude who has his own pad. Sally Kaslow, author of Slouching Toward Adulthood: Observations from the Not-So-Empty Nest shares her tips on how to navigate this potential minefield.
See the Big Picture
If you’re dating a man who lives at home, odds are it doesn’t bother you…that much. If you find it’s nagging you a little, focus on the long-term: It’s probably not your man’s fault that he can’t find the perfect job or afford rent at the moment (but that doesn’t mean he won’t be able to down the road).
Don’t Assume He’s Broke
Plenty of well-employed dudes are living with the parents now to save money for a down-payment on a house, or to pay off student loans, which is actually really, really smart.
Offer to Go Halfsies
Whether he’s living with the ‘rents to save cash or is un- or underemployed, your guy most likely isn’t going to be a big spender. So offer to split the check when you go out, and suggest cheap dates like hikes, dinner at your place, etc.
Help With His Job Search
If he’s unemployed, his job search is probably one of the biggest things in his life right now. Offer to help with tweaking his resume, attending network events, and putting out feelers, but don’t push if he’d rather do it on his own.
Get a Timetable
While a lot of driven, financially-savvy guys are living at home now, there are definitely some slackers doing the same thing. Ask about his timetable for living at home—does he have a plan to leave? And find out how he helps out around the house. Helping to pay rent, buying groceries, cleaning, and cooking for his parents are all good signs.
Suss Out the Privacy Sitch
Before you start doing overnight visits, ask him how much privacy he has and how his parents feel about sleepovers. If he has his own space, and they’re cool with overnighters, you should be too.
Be Friendly With the ‘Rents
Ladies would this ever work for you? Please let me know your thoughts.
Via: Cosmopolitan.com -Korn Miller
