WORDS BY JR THE WRITER
10. Don’t ever try to understand why men are obsessed with football.
Just like we will never understand why you pay hundreds to thousands of dollars on a bag that holds things just as well as the $20 purse, you will never understand the love of the game.
9. Please do not stand in front of the television if you want something.
While it’s true that every down is important, there is no need for you to block the television to get our attention. Just wait for a commercial please!
8. Don’t pretend you know football to try and impress men.
Y’all would know if we were faking it while talking about shoes and makeup, and the same thing goes for you and football. If you want to impress your guy’s friends, just watch the game (quietly), that’s enough in itself.
7. If we want you to wear a jersey, just wear it!
He’s not asking you to speak on the cover defense; he just wants some support from you.
6. You will not be dragging us to a baby shower, mall, or any other activity where a man will be forced to just stand there and look helpless on a Sunday!
Do you know why there are no church services from 1-7? It’s not so you can play baby bingo at a shower, it’s because Jesus wants us to be near a TV, radio or computer.
5. If you see your man upset about his team losing or a certain play, PLEASE do not say something along the lines of “It’s just a game” or “It’s okay, honey.”
While the response to the both of those statements are a huge “No, it’s not,” all you’ll really get is a silent response, as we get even angrier from your comment. So if you see we’re upset because of a play or just the game in general, just walk away. The situation at this point can only go down from here on.
4. If you decide to watch the game with us, DON’T ask what happened during every play.
I’d be glad to teach you football and all of its wonderful footballness, just not during my game. If you want to get into it, let’s watch a game that doesn’t matter to me like the Raiders versus the Rams, and I can explain everything then. By the way, if I yell “WHAT?!” It’s not that I don’t understand, I’m just pissed.
3. If you want something, the best time to ask for it is after a nice victory from our favorite team.
Remember, I was talking about how you guys like bags that cost $500 more because there’s a C, LV or whatever letter logo on it? Well, if you see that my team just won and are going to be in the Superbowl, your best bet is to sneak in the suggestion during that time. Especially if it was an overtime game, we’ll go pick up that overly priced bag tonight!
2. Please don’t expect us to eat or do anything healthy on Sunday.
I volunteered to help walk the collection plate down the aisles at church, that’s enough! Beer, wings, ribs, steaks, and any other animal you can just throw in a huge fryer, is the only thing that I will consume on Sundays. We can walk it off at the park on the next day holding hands as I happily reminisce about that hit on Tom Brady.
1. Don’t EVER say the words “You love your stupid football game more than me.”
Secretly, we probably do but God forbid we ever even act like we’re thinking about it. We don’t go into your closet and start throwing around your shoes while you’re looking at them, saying you love shoes more than us. So whatever problem, activity, and drama you have with me during the game, PLEASE don’t ruin the day by saying those words.
Will women and men always disagree on sports? Ladies, could you date a guy that was a super sports fanatic? If so, could you respect his desire to be left alone when a game was on? Would you be willing to host his friends over at the house for a big game? Would you be willing to learn about your man’s sport of choice? Fellas, have you ever broken up with a girl over a game? Have you ever dated a girl that was into sports more than you? Was that a plus or a negative? Have you found that one of the few times men get emotional is when it comes to sports? What did you think of JR the Writer’s rules for women?
via NWSO
