It looks or at least it looked last week, like spring was going to come early this year. The temperatures here in the Mid-Atlantic and into the Northeast have everyone thinking Spring is here. Flowers are blooming in February, people are wearing shorts and that spring feel is in the air.
But as much as spring is about flowers and warmer weather, it is also about transition from the old and moving to the new. We move from big down feathered bundles of coats to short sleeves and light jackets. We put away winter’s blues away and break out the new and colorful attitude of spring. We “spring clean” our homes of every that speaks of winter and get ready for the light carefree months to come.
But how about in our marriages? Is it time, regardless of the month of the year or the temperature outside, to spring clean our relationship? To put away the dullness that winter can bring and break out a light new attitude and perspective. I have learned, in my own marriage, that some things might not change. We can complain and fuss and pout, but some things won’t change. Don’t worry, your spouse is reading this and saying the same thing – LOL.
The reality is that we can not change our spouse, if we can change anything or anybody, we can change ourselves. We buy books, go to seminars and talk to other people for solutions to fix our spouse and our marriage, but the reality is, some problems are not meant to change. Some problems exist and are meant to grow us up and shift our perspective around. If challenges did not exist, we would not find ourselves in prayer, or in search of deeper communication and solutions within our marriage.
It is a perspective that may take years to arrive at, but when attained will provide a life time of peace. So begin some spring cleaning in your marriage relationship.
Sweep out the dust and cobwebs of your mind. Forgive what was done to you during the winter, it is spring time.
Vacuum your heart. The places where you have been walked on and the carpet is worn. Speak your peace and start anew.
Wash the residue of winter’s salt and snow off the window’s of your soul. Pray for a new attitude.
Pull up the weeds. Long cold winter season kills off everything fruitful. Confess how you feel about what exists in your relationship and then work toward banishing it from your relationship. Truthful, honest communication kills weeds and makes the ground fertile for new growth.
Plant seed of hope. At times it seems like going on ain’t going to happen. But this spring, plant hope. Take on some new challenges, set some goals that give your relationship something to look forward to.
Water. Every new season of growth needs to be nurtured. Designate time, specific time, that you will spend watering your garden.
Enjoy the season you are in. Just as winter comes to an end, spring gives way to the heat of summer. So as you realize that something’s wont change, enjoy what good their is in the relationship. He or she is not perfect, they have a longer list of faults than we would like, but enjoy the good things that made you first fall in love with them.
Whether they change or not is really not within your control. But, this spring let your attitude be light and your perspective be new and free. Life is shorter than short, so determine to enjoy every moment of it. Happy spring!
By Edward Lee
